Trusting.

couple holding hands love people

A while ago my credit card, that I use to pay for my online Christian therapist, was shut down due to suspicious online activity and I was alerted through voice and text messages. I was super busy.  I forgot to call the call back number.

But when my therapist emailed me asking if I could fix my credit card issue so we could still have our weekly session I figured I better get to it.

NO, I hadn’t charged hundreds of dollars to Walmart.com the day they shut my card down. And yes, the charge to my therapist should be allowed.

The fraud department said they would mail me a new card with new numbers.

After the card came I went online to activate it (in the past I’d always called a number on the new card for activation–but there were only website instructions this time).

As I registered my account (I’d never set up an online account for that card) I saw there were several thousand dollars in cash back rewards that had accumulated (I’ve had the account for many years and had forgotten it had cash back rewards). I applied the dollars to my account. Now I can either go on a shopping spree or have free therapy for quite a while.

As an added bonus, it always bothered me that the security number on that particular card was 666. The new security number I just received has prophetic significance to scripture and denotes God at work. MUCH BETTER than the universal symbol of satan.

In summation: there was an attempted breach, but nothing was actually stolen from me. Then God revealed that I had some hidden money coming to me. And, to top it off: I no longer carry around a card in my wallet stamped with 666.

I wrote two days ago about a minister I follow calling Kavanaugh’s accusers harlots in his blog. I was really troubled, saddened, and grieved the loss as I am not sure I can continue to listen to his messages. Listening to his sermons got me through many dark days when the PTSD hit. My BHH didn’t understand it as he is a fiery type of preacher but his tell-it-like-it-is truth telling was soothing to me and I often fell asleep (the rest was needed). Eventually we started listening to his sermons together and we both learned a great deal from him. Ordinarily I listen to his Wednesday night youtube sermon on Thursday afternoons while I am running errands.

Yesterday I played Bible audio from http://www.biblegateway.com on my weekly trip. I was able to listen to the entire Book of Galatians and Ephesians while driving. I don’t have space here to share how much those two epistles spoke to me. Far more than the sermon I listened to on last week’s errand-run.

My family of origin is a mess. I’ve written about it prior. There was another attempted breach into my life a while back and I’ve realized that if I run into one of them I cannot so much as be civil to them. I need to keep no contact and treat them as the enemies they have proven themselves to be.

One of the reasons I have waffled and gone back to civil contact is because it just seems so very lonely to live life cut off from your birth family. And the guilt. So much guilt. But I have busted through a lot of shame and the guilt has lifted a great deal now. There is some lingering fear; but I am learning how to trust and walk through that.

Then last night my BHH came home from a business trip with two bags of treats for me. He was only gone a day and I have no idea how he found time to find such perfect pick-me-up items. I truly believe that God made up for my childhood by giving me such a husband.

I know, from these experiences, that God is protecting me and restoring me. I am hoping to trust, in the future, that when God allows an attempted breach, or something to be taken away, He replaces it with something even better.

 

 

Author: justsaltwriter

I am a writer living in America. A Christian hoping to live up to that name. This is my anonymous blog. I am in recovery from abuse and on this blog I will touch on those topics. I hope to obey Jesus and let my light shine in a world which is growing ever darker.

4 thoughts on “Trusting.”

  1. Day-um girl! If I had the 666 on my card when it was issued, I would have cut the card with some scissors then called customer support and said, “unfortunately my card was cut with a pair of scissors, could you reissue me a new card?”
    Hell to the naw!!! Mmmm mmm.

    Glad you have a great husband! Nice to hear God gave you that blessing 😊

    Liked by 1 person

    1. lol- I will keep that hilarious option in mind for next time! Love your quick wit 🤣
      At the time I noticed it on the card I just forced myself to be ok with it rather than a fearful response. As in most things, and as you have said ‘the more you know…’ researching deeper into my fears and issues helps me deal.
      So I studied the meaning of numbers in scripture and six is simply ‘the number of man’ (man was created on 6th day). A number doubled is confirmation and a number tripled is like confirmation ‘with a cherry on top’ and thus it is really, really confirmed…so 666 isn’t necessarily that scary to me anymore, even though people see it as ‘satan’ (and I am still quite alarmed seeing it, just more reflective and less reactive). Now I take its meaning as ‘man going mans own way’ (away from God), as several times it’s showed up in my life as a warning or in a place I need to be cautious, slow down, and be more prayerful. Similarly I learned that 444 is man in tune with and following God’s will for him. That has shown up a few key times in my life as well.
      Point being: It wasn’t all bad to have that number on a credit card where I could easily go my own way far from God in the spending department! Now that it’s gone I feel I must have mastered something or other which was once an issue for me.
      Alas, though, once one issue resolves I see a dozen more ways I am still struggling. Having good support helps. Thanks for supporting my writing!!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Always support you and your writing! Thanks for explaining and educating me on the numbers. On the left, I think I will always have a weird superstition about that number! LOL

        Liked by 1 person

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